Archive for January, 2010
Empty Nest couples, like Tom and Maribeth, are called to new choices, more freedoms, and new ways of loving each other in this grace filled stage of marriage.
Our daughter Mary just won’t stay in bed. We vacillate between comforting Mary, demanding that she go back to bed, and criticizing each other’s parenting style. It’s beginning to wear on our relationship. What can we do to preserve our sanity and get a little quality time with each other at night?
There’s been a big change in peoples’ attitudes about using marijuana, and it’s a change that may affect parents all over America. One recent poll discovered that 46 percent of Americans support legalizing small amounts for personal use. What does this trend mean for parents?
It used to be hard to find time for each other what with work and the boys, but when our Jimmy was diagnosed with profound autism, it was like a bomb went off. Tom just withdrew into work and all my time was taken up taking Jimmy from one doctor to another and trying to keep my other kids’ lives as normal as possible. All of a sudden, the little bit of time Tom and I had was totally gone.
Readiness for marriage cannot be scientifically measured, but an inventory helps engaged couples to make sure that they have discussed the most important issues. These are NOT tests, but rather instruments that prompt discussion on sometimes sensitive issues
Sam (45) and Sally (37) have been married for 2-1/2 years. It’s a second marriage for both. Sam was married at 20, divorced at 35 and has done co-parenting with his ex-wife for a number of years. Sam brings two children from his first marriage, ages 14 and 12.
Budgeting falls into the category of things that are good for you but not necessarily emotionally appealing, like flossing your teeth or exercising. The truth of the matter, though, is that everyone budgets. Drawing up a budget is just making your spending more intentional rather than allowing your whims to determine how you will spend your money or your time.
This is a generational story about lunch boxes. My daughter, Carole, wanted a new lunch box for first grade. To save money, I spray painted the old one, much to her dismay.
Exchange answers with your fiancé(e). Which experience of your fiancé(e) is most different from yours? Discuss what impact this might have on your future marriage.
The decision to marry is the biggest decision that most people make in a lifetime. Following is a list of danger signs. If any of these are present in your relationship now, it is best to postpone the marriage until the issue is resolved.
We have been happily married for fifteen years and believe we have handled most of our parenting well, but now our fourteen year old daughter’s drive for independence often causes us to argue. When she wants to go to a party or to the mall with her friends, my husband and I react differently, in ways that surprise both of us.
A study from the National Marriage Project at Rutgers University.
Dates don’t always have to be in the evening. Consider a lunch date. It’s cheaper than dinner and if your kids are in school you don’t need a babysitter.
Just when you thought I couldn’t possibly have any more wedding-related news, at eight months out, I finally put the last batch of thank you cards in the mail this week! I’m terrible, I know. What remained of them after the first half was finished had been stashed in a grocery bag and moved around [...]
Is your marriage going well? Great! Maybe it’s time to give back. Consider passing on your hard-earned wisdom as a mentor to engaged couples or taking leadership in a marriage enrichment program.
“Nothing – not even divorce or death – can place limits on God’s gracious love.” (Follow the Way of Love) Strive to love your spouse as God does.
Marriage is like owning a car. Preventitive maintenance (enrichment, paying attention to the little grumblings, counseling before it’s broken) can save a big repair bill later.
What’s the most important factor in choosing a spouse? Consider these three criteria: physical attraction + shared values + full committment = a chance to make marriage work.
How much money is really necessary to have a happy marriage? Some would say, “just a little bit more.” Have you noticed that as your income rises it seems like your needs increase also?
“[Love] is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury.” (1 Corinthians 13:5) Sure, you might be right, but nursing that grudge will not heal your relationship. Let go of negative feelings.
In the spirit of learning new skills, try trading homemaking tasks for a day. It can bring new appreciation for the other. Even if the job doesn’t get done as well, it can provide a laugh.
Throughout my life, there has always some particular thing that I was sure would be able to improve my life. For example, “If only I had bell bottom pants, everything would be better” (grade 6); “If only I had a better hair straightener” (grades 8-12); “If only I could find pants that fit me perfectly [...]
Martin Luther King, Jr. spoke about equality between the races. In marriage we call this mutuality. Is there any area of your marriage you want to be more equal (chores, parenting, income, affection)?
Resolving an argument: Strategy #5 CREATE A NEW SOLUTION. If compromise or co-existing won’t work, try brainstorming new win/win solutions.
Resolving an argument: Strategy #3 CO-EXIST. When neither of you is willing to move from your position, it may be possible to agree to disagree. Tomorrow: #5