Archive for March, 2010
Stuck in an argument? Try these three questions: How do you/I feel? What do you/I want or need? What can you/I do about it?
“They must be crazy!” The priest repeated this refrain in his homily at our wedding on May 9, 1998, at the church on the campus of the University of Notre Dame. We were technically still college seniors, celebrating the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony the day after finals.
Not only can a marriage involving a Catholic and a member of another faith community succeed “without either person ‘losing’ his or her faith in the process,” but the couple can make their home a holy place, Carol Gastelum writes in this little book.
A grand, continuing journey is set in motion when a woman and man marry–one encompassing countless other, briefer journeys that over the years a couple undertakes together. In “While We Wait,” religion writer Heidi Schlumpf recounts one such journey that led to the adoption of a baby boy from Vietnam.
Be deliberate about saying “no” to some things so you can open up time for a regular date night. Saying “no” to one thing allows you to say “yes” to more important things.
From Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan The human person is a union of body and soul in a single being. Man and woman are two different ways of being a human person.
The Millennial Generation in the U.S., the first generation to come of age in the new millennium, values parenthood and marriage “far above career and financial success,” according to a Feb. 24 report on a 2010 Pew Research Center survey. However, the Millennials are not “rushing to the altar” to get married, the Pew Center said.
Much of the church’s vision for marriage “seems unreasonable and outdated” without “the firm understanding and belief that God is at the heart of every marriage,” said Archbishop Vincent Nichols of Westminster, England. A purpose of the celebration was to affirm that God’s presence “makes clear the true nature of marriage.” People are led inevitably to regard marriage as “disposable and replaceable” when God’s role is not acknowledged, the archbishop said.
Marriage preparation is “precious work” both because “we know that the foundations of a long and happy marriage are laid down in its earliest years” and, “just as surely,” because “the seeds of later problems are sown in the neglects of that period,” British Archbishop Vincent Nichols of Westminster said in a Feb. 14 homily in Liverpool. The archbishop said that “marriage preparation is essentially a spiritual work.”
The Pontifical Council for the Family’s plan to develop a handbook on marriage preparation was welcomed by Pope Benedict XVI. The pope re-emphasized the need for a developmental approach to marriage preparation that extends all the way from early youth to the time the sacrament of matrimony is celebrated.
Husbands and wives handle conflict better if they tend to speak of “we,” “our” and “us,” rather than “me,” “I” or “you,” researchers have found. They analyzed 15-minute conversations focused on points of conflict between 154 middle-age and older couples.
Couples ought to “learn to talk about money early and often,” Jeff Opdyke wrote in a column for Valentine’s Day 2010 in The Wall Street Journal. But it is rare that money is the “real culprit” for a couple, Opdyke suggested. Instead, a “lack of communication” tends to be the issue.
From Follow the Way of Love Like the whole Church, every Christian family rests on a firm foundation, namely Christ’s promise to be faithful to those he has chosen.
Talking is not always the same as communication. Talk is cheap. Being a person of one’s word and following through with action makes communication true.
Has life handed you a setback? Don’t take it out on each other. Face it side by side, not pointing a finger at each other.
From Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan Conjugal love, the love proper to marriage, is present in the commitment to the complete and total gift of self between husband and wife.
From Address of Pope Benedict XVI at the Fifth World Meeting of Families Open your homes and hearts to Christ so that he will be your strength and joy.
Take the time to really kiss your spouse everyday. Slow down and enjoy the moment. Who knows when the next will come.
Right now, Daniel and I are in Birmingham, Alabama for the first of five weddings we will be attending this year. Daniel’s brother John is getting married on Saturday. He was best man in our wedding last year, and now Daniel is best man in his.
Right now, Daniel and I are in Birmingham, Alabama for the first of five weddings we will be attending this year. Daniel’s brother John is getting married on Saturday. He was best man in our wedding last year, and now Daniel is best man in his. We had a hard time getting out the door [...]
From God Is Love One [meaning of love] in particular stands out: love between man and woman, where body and soul are inseperably joined.
Marriage is a commitment in which we chose to forego other choices. This “lack of freedom” frees us to stop searching. We can risk being our truest, best self because we are loved unconditionally.
Marriage is not an athletic contest so don’t try to keep score. Eventually both partners must win or else the game is over.
God created man in his image; in the divine image him; male and female he created them. Genesis 1: 27
This week, I thought I’d share with you some words from Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta, as quoted in a beautiful book I was given by a friend at work called “Prayerfully Expecting: A Nine-Month Novena for Mothers to Be” by Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle. (I highly recommend it!)
“What was the Good News that Christ had come to give? That God is love. That God loves you. God loves me. That God has made you and made me for better things to love and to be loved. We are not just a number in the world. That’s why it is so wonderful to recognize the presence of that unborn child, the gift of God. The greatest gift of God to a family is the child, because it is the fruit of love.