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For Your Marriage

Meet Sara and Justin. They married in June 2011, they welcomed their first child in August 2012.

Change, Change, Change

Sara: Just a week after discussing how AWESOME marriage is, I’ve found it harder this week. My trouble isn’t Justin’s willingness to help around the house, his consideration of my feelings, or even too much time spent on football.

Justin: That will come later when college football starts!

Sara: Instead, the “harder” comes from trying to find a new balance in our lives.

When we were dating and engaged, Justin and I were constantly on the move – traveling to see each other, visiting friends, and going on dates. Now that we are married, we’re attempting to save for a down payment on a house, and are trying to save money where possible. This has meant a smaller entertainment budget than we’ve previously had.

As a result, we’ve been spending a lot more time at home, both on weeknights and on weekends. It’s been so great to have more “us” time, but at the same time I almost feel a bit “confined” to the apartment. And the unseasonably warm temperatures haven’t helped encourage us to get out of the house, either!

It’s interesting to try to strike a balance between “dates” and economically friendly. We’ve also been spoiled because there is a lot more to do in Kansas City where I used to live versus our new small town. It will be a great place to eventually raise our family, God willing, but it can be difficult for young adults to find opportunities to get out.

This weekend we even had our first fight because I wanted to get out and Justin wanted to stay in!

Justin has been great, cooking me breakfast and dinner almost daily because I’ve been working full-time and Justin has had very flexible hours in the summer.

Justin: The hardest change for me is that I have to cook 12 times more often. Not only do the main dishes go twice as fast, but leftovers go more quickly as well. And she is so spoiled! The other day she asked me why I didn’t pour her cereal.

Sara: Speaking of work, I’ve been getting up early for a 45-minute commute to work each day. I joke we are now “old married people” as it’s not uncommon to be in bed before 9:30– which would have been unheard of for me just three short months ago. Thankfully, I’m a morning person and I’m hopefully inspiring Justin to become more of a morning person as well.

Finding time to pray both together and separately has also been interesting. In the end, we’ve decided to pray our daily Chaplet of Divine Mercy inspired by St. Faustina following dinner each night. This way, we’re both sure to be awake when we pray together!

However, not all of the changes are bad. I really have enjoyed having more time to spend with Justin. And, as a friend pointed out, I’ve really mellowed since getting married. Living with Justin has taught me how important it is to pick my battles and focus on the positive whenever possible. However, the best part of being married is simply being together!