Sara: Lately, I’ve noticed Gus demands attention whenever Justin and I are together. If Gus is playing on the floor and I sit and cuddle up with Justin, Gus wants to nurse. I think Gus thinks he is going to miss out on some fun!
Justin: Gus hasn’t learned that love grows as you begin to include more people. He gets jealous and begins to compete for attention.
Sara: It’s hard, because as much as I love Gus, I know Justin and I need some time for affection as well.
Justin: Time is necessary for any friendship to thrive. It is the only commodity capable of making friendships grow. We all have those friends who we rarely see. With our best friends, we can even pick up the friendship as if we haven’t been apart. However, it is only in those times together that friendship deepens so that it can survive the times apart.
Sara: One unexpected surprise is that Gus has started going to bed a bit earlier with the time change. Therefore, Justin and I have had an hour or so of uninterrupted time together, and it’s been wonderful.
Justin: Until we found a way to spend some time together just the two of us, I didn’t realize how much I missed just hanging out with Sara. We haven’t done anything fancy; we’ve mainly just watched television and talked.
It really hasn’t been about the activity, but rather about being in one another’s presence.
Sara: While I’ve never stopped knowing how wonderful Justin is, some time with just the two of us has reminded me why we got married.
The past 15 plus months have mainly been about caring for Gus. While we’ve tried to put time aside for each other, it’s easy to always find something else that needs to be done. The cooking, cleaning, and laundry never stop, and Justin’s honey-do list perpetually has four or five items on it. I can think of chores faster than he can do them!
Justin: Just as we invest in “upgrades” to our house regularly (like the new refrigerator we bought to replace our 22 year old one), we need to invest in our marriage by spending time together without Gus.
Sara: Typically, when we visit my folks every month or two, we’ll make time to go out for lunch just the two of us. However, I’m realizing it’s important to have “us” time even more frequently. We need to show Gus that just because Justin and I love each other doesn’t mean we don’t love Gus.
Our time together doesn’t have to be expensive or take a lot of planning. Just being together without Gus pulling at our legs is a rare opportunity.