How Marriage Has Made Me a Better Person, available at:

Learning To Say I Do

How Marriage Has Made Me a Better Person

September 22, 2011

Sara: As we celebrate our three month anniversary on Sunday (hint, hint, Justin), I’ve been pondering exactly how marriage has changed me for the better. Since I love lists, here we go:

1. I appreciate my parents more. Like most teenagers, I pretty much assumed if my parents said it, it must be wrong. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve appreciated their advice and witness more, but I only really realized what a gift God had given me in my parents and family after Justin and I got married. I now understand a bit better why and how they have sacrificed for me and my siblings throughout the years, and I pray Justin and I can be graced with the sacrificial hearts my parents had throughout our childhood. In addition, Justin has been blessed with wonderful parents as well.

2. I’m more considerate. After college, I felt like I spent several years in “limbo” – single people know exactly what I’m talking about. While I still was part of my “growing up” family consisting of my parents and siblings, I didn’t have to live with others on a day in and day out basis. Unfortunately, over time, that helped me become a bit selfish because I never had to think of others and I tended to live an unbalanced life – the focus was either all on work or all on play. Dishes could pile up in the sink, and I could easily get behind in housework. Now, since everything I do affects Justin, I’m more considerate in my daily actions.

Justin: It’s still a work in progress for both of us. For example, a couple of nights ago at about 2:00 am, Sara was cold so she promptly got up, pulled all the covers off the bed, and made it. THE ONLY PROBLEM WAS I WAS STILL SLEEPING IN IT! Let’s just say I had all I could do to be considerate at that moment as well.

Sara: What can I say? I still find it easier to be considerate when I am fully conscious!

3. I have more compassion. While I’m still a newbie, I understand this married life better than I ever did as a single person. I can better appreciate how other people’s lives are or can be swirling, and I have more appreciation for both the working parents and the stay at home parents than ever before. As Justin and I begin to have the conversations of how we will raise our family, God willing, I realize more fully how many choices and sacrifices families make. And I realize I need to cut others slack because I truly don’t know what I would do in the same situation.

4. The longer I’m married, the more I realize I don’t know. I don’t know what it’s like to be pregnant, have a new baby, or be responsible for a child. I don’t know what it’s like to work to provide for my children, even when I’d rather stay at home with them. I don’t know what it’s like to stay at home with my children even if I’d rather go to work. Really, it all boils down to I don’t know anything at all about expanding a family. Thankfully, families come one step at a time, and God’s promised to never give me more than I can handle.

5. I’m more likely to admit that I’m wrong. Justin’s good at lovingly calling me out when I’m wrong, whether it’s in my actions when I tell him about my day, things I do in front of him, or housework I’ve ignored. Since I have more opportunities to see the mistakes I make throughout the day, I realize I’m not perfect and have an opportunity to work on those things I struggle with.

6. I am healthier. Justin helps me eat more fruits and veggies. Since he cooks most of the time (and cooks pretty healthy, I might add), I am less likely to eat fast, greasy food – including takeout, frozen pizza and dinners, and excessive amounts of sweets. We also try to walk after dinner, so I exercise more than I did as a single person.

7. Justin helps me pray every day, even when I don’t feel like it. Let’s face it – sometimes, after a long day at work, I don’t feel like praying. And because we’ve established a family routine, we pray together. Some days, that’s all the prayer time I have, but we pray together as a family. I pray we may continue to grow together in holiness!


Reader Comments (1)

  • I’m from Madrid (Spain), married this year also, the 2nd. of July. So we are kind of walking this road toghether! :) Thank you for all your posts, since many months ago, you have been a wave of hope in my life. God bless you and your marriage.


Leave a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Learning To Say I Do

Learning To Say I Do

Meet Sara and Justin. Married in June 2011, they welcomed their first child in August 2012. They’re trying to make their Catholic faith a priority as they juggle work and home responsibilities.

More For Your Marriage

Throughout, links to other websites are provided solely for the user’s convenience.
USCCB assumes no responsibility for these websites, their content, or their sponsoring organizations.

Copyright © 2017, United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. All rights reserved.
3211 4th Street, N.E., Washington DC 20017-1194, (202) 541-3000 © USCCB.

How Marriage Has Made Me a Better Person, available at: