Learning To Say I Do
Justin: Sara and I had a bit of an unusual week. Unusual, because it was the longest we have been apart since we have been married.
This past weekend one of our very good friends got married in Denver, Colorado. I lived in Denver for three years and was really looking forward to seeing many of my old friends. Since we are trying to save all of Sara’s vacation time for after the baby comes, we decided that I would go without her. Therefore, my friend Davey and I road-tripped to the wedding together.
It was quite an interesting experience. In many ways it was kind of like living in two worlds, the single world and the married world. First, we stayed at a friend of mine’s house in Denver. I have known Todd and several of his roommates for years and I always have a great time when I visit.
This time, however, I noticed how much I have changed. The best way I can describe Todd’s place on the weekend is to say it is like a frat house. Time doesn’t mean much, because no one goes to bed and there is never any reason to get up early in the morning. You also eat whatever you can scrounge up for breakfast, usually while sitting on the couch.
This is the opposite of the family life that Sara and I have begun to foster. It is very important to Sara that dinner time is family time. Sara and I always eat breakfast and supper together at the dining room table with no other distractions. While it took me a bit of time to get used to it, I have really come to value the time together. We also have established a routine of going to bed early each night.
While it was kind of fun to be living the carefree lifestyle, in many ways I felt like I just didn’t fit in the single life anymore. Each night as I lay down I couldn’t help thinking to myself that I miss my wife and am thankful to have her.
Going to the wedding was like stepping into another world. At the reception I had the opportunity to spend some time with the many of my old friends who are now married with children. It was interesting watching them with their children.
As I watched, I couldn’t help thinking, “I am not sure I am ready for this!” Sometimes, when I think about the baby coming, I feel like I am standing on the train tracks about to get run over by the train. It is scary to think about giving up much of the freedom Sara and I have now in order to surrender it in caring for baby Kraft.
On the other hand, it was good to see that the only thing that makes the carefree lifestyle carefree is that you have no one to care for. Just a few short years ago, I couldn’t imagine living the married life. Now I can’t imagine life without Sara. Perhaps surrendering your freedom isn’t nearly so difficult when you are surrendering out of love.
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