Season of Waiting, available at: ForYourMarriage.org


Learning To Say I Do

Season of Waiting


December 15, 2011

Sara: ‘Tis the season of waiting – or at least that’s what the Mass readings have reminded us lately. This past week, God has moved pretty quickly in some unexpected ways.

Recently, we found a realtor and started looking at houses. It’s been great fun to see homes and see if Justin and I can picture making the house into a home. We figured we’d try and buy a house sometime this spring; however, this weekend we fell in love with a raised ranch in the ideal location. After looking at four or five more houses on Tuesday, we decided to put in an offer. After several counteroffers, we’re still waiting to hear if the house is ours.

I feel the journey the past week towards homeownership has been quite quick. It’s been so quick that Justin and I have gone over the budget four and five times this past week to help determine what we believe we can afford not only on a short term basis, but also on a long term basis. When we have children, God willing, Justin and I want to have the option of me working less than full time if we so desire. This means sacrifice not only after the kids are born but now as well. Justin and I didn’t put an offer on the newest or most expensive home we could – we simply determined what we believed we could afford both as a big number and on a monthly basis.

Justin: I’m actually surprised how emotionally attached I am to the house. As we were sitting in our realtor’s office, I found myself worrying that we would “lose” the house. I am generally a very slow and very analytical decision maker. I think moving slow keeps me from making emotional decisions. Even if I am emotionally attached, my emotions have generally run their course before I make a final decision.

We have also seen the effects of the emotional roller coaster in our interaction today. For example, I snapped at Sara during dinner for almost no reason. This upset her and for the next 30 minutes, despite both trying our best, we had very little patience for one another. It was hard because I felt like we weren’t on the same page; we weren’t working as a cohesive team at the very moment we were preparing for one of the biggest decisions of our married life.

By the way, I am sorry for snapping at you, Sara!

Even though it meant we were about 5 minutes late to meet the realtor to prepare our counteroffer, we decided to just stop and take a few minutes to pray together. This really re-centered both of us, and I am so thankful that we have a God who answers prayers and provides the firm foundation for our life.

Sara: As much as I like the house, there will always be other houses. It’s actually been very hard to wait. All day at work, I was on pins and needles to wait and hear either from the realtor or from Justin the homeowners’ decision on our offer. Now, I’m anxious to see if they will accept our counteroffer.

In many ways, I look forward to homeownership. I’ve grown weary of apartment living, including hearing our neighbors at odd hours of the day and night, and the lack of parking we have at our current apartment. At the same time, I realize that a house is work. There is snow to shovel, grass to mow, carpet to vacuum, and items to fix. However, I look forward to having a space to entertain family and friends, and perhaps one day hosting Easter at our family home.

As we wait to hear about our offer, I’m very nervous. I can’t decide if I would prefer for them to accept or reject our offer. On one hand, we really like the house. On the other hand, neither of us have ever spent this much money before in our lives. It’s scary to think about how many years we will be making a mortgage payment! In addition, if we choose this house, we are choosing to forego all other houses….it feels kind of like a marriage!

 

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Learning To Say I Do

Learning To Say I Do

Meet Sara and Justin. Married in June 2011, they welcomed their first child in August 2012. They’re trying to make their Catholic faith a priority as they juggle work and home responsibilities.


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